Putin calls off further European invasion after Greek shop owner threatens to "smacka his head"
NOT PLAYING GAMES: Putin has officially announced that he will be disengaging from all military conflict against Ukraine and the rest of...
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Eye of Sauron briefly appeared above Big Ben at peak temperature of UK heatwave
WOULD YOU LOOK AT THE TIME: As the United Kingdom was subjected to a heatwave this week, confusion set in to the public when the most...
Alt-Right fringe group boycott popular snack Twisties due to Smith's anti-straight agenda
LIFE IS PRETTY STRAIGHT WITHOUT TWISTIES: Twisties have been a staple in Australia's snacking habits since they were first released 70...
Local conservative relates to Nineteen Eighty-Four as his racist internal monologue is "literally Th
Local conservative relates to Nineteen Eighty-Four as his racist internal monologue is "literally Thoughtcrime" LOOK OUT FOR THE THOUGHT...
Boris Johnson channels Leonardo DiCaprio by yelling 'I'm not fucking leaving' at end of resignation
THE WOLF OF DOWNING STREET: After a string of resignations in his party and calls to resign himself, UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson...
Claiming that climate change causes NSW floods is like claiming that a square has four equal sides
PREPOSTEROUS: Studies have shown that people who believe climate change has been the main factor in the recent NSW floods also believe...
Middle aged disgruntled man keen to blame Labor for skyrocketing fuel after excise cut finishes
WHO'S TO BLAME? 46-year-old devout Liberal voter, Derrick Jones, has expressed his excitement for a new thing to blame on Labor. Just as...
Senator Hollie Hughes announces solution to Marxist teachers: Fascist teachers
SEIZE THE MEANS OF TEACHING: Hollie Hughes, Liberal senator for NSW, was recently in the news for her statement on the current situation...
Conspiracy theorists having a hard time linking mandatory mask usage to facial recognition
WHO'S BEHIND IT ALL? After reports have surfaced of facial recognition being used in Australian stores, conspiracy theorists were...
Australian public confused why the government hasn't blamed another country for Australia's problems
WHO IS IN CHARGE? Just weeks after Labor won the federal election, the Australian public has now begun to wonder why the government in...
All American public schools set to close after it was revealed that attendance was infringing on Ame
All American public schools set to close after it was revealed that attendance was infringing on American's inalienable right to live...
Supreme Court overturns Roe V. Wade because kids are likely to get shot during show-and-tell anyway
In a momentous decision by the US Supreme Court, Roe V. Wade has been overturned, making it increasingly difficult for American women to...
Russian government blacklist local plumber Joe for calling Putin "pretty fucked ay"
OH NO! Joe, 32-year-old plumber, is in tears this afternoon since finding out that he has been blacklisted by the Russian government. He...
Misinformed Deepdive: Do facts care about your feelings?
To start this investigation let's start with defining what a fact is: 'a fact is a thing that is known or proved to be true'. Now, let's...
Man arrested after placing flag on Harbour Bridge without charging 25 mil
YOU CAN'T GET AWAY WITH THAT! In shock news this afternoon, an individual attempted to place an Aboriginal flag on the Harbour Bridge...
Jordan Peterson fan celebrates after winning another imaginary argument
TAKE THAT LIBERAL! A group of conservatives today are celebrating after winning an imaginary argument with an imaginary person. Their...
Anthony Albanese and Jacinda Ardern meet to debate which country owns Lamingtons
THE GREAT DEBATE: After many heated discussions online over the origins of Lamingtons, New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern and...
Russia and Ukraine agree to end war over a game of Battleships
After many rounds of negotiations, Russian leader Vladimir Putin and Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelenskyy have agreed to decide the war...
Misinformed Deepdive: Is it Al-ba-Knee-zee or Al-ba-knees?
While Labor was successful in their campaign to sway voters, there is one election issue that they simply failed to provide a...
Matrix extra, Perin Davey, evidently chose the elusive green pill to become Deputy Leader of the Nat
CHOICE IS AN ILLUSION: Perin Davey, a former Extra in the Matrix movie, has "chosen" the ‘Green Pill’ to become the Deputy leader of the...
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