“GET OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU DONKEY!” shouted a very unimpressed Paul, a Lebanese-Australian father in Sydney’s South, at his daughter’s Turkish partner after making the bold claim that his homeland invented the national comfort food: the kebab. A screaming match ensued between both fully grown men, aggressively brandishing their phones at each other regarding who had opened the first kebab shop in Sydney, or where the word döner comes from. The fight came to a screeching halt when the Greek neighbour shouted over the fence that “kebabs are nothing tomy gyros!”, causing the men to band together against this new enemy.
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