UN-BE-LEAF-ABLE: Hipster vegans across the eastern states have unanimously agreed to stop eating cabbage after it became 'mainstream' in the past few weeks, as fast food restaurants are using it due to the low availability of iceberg lettuce. A spokesperson stated that many of their people have been eating cabbage for years, and always claimed it was underrated and that the general public were definitely missing out. Ironically, these same people are now refusing to eat it for the opposite reasons - the spokesperson also told us that cabbage used to be cool, and they should have never changed it. We're really not sure what they meant, but they're hipsters so at least it's harmless.
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